Driving .. me Nuts !!

my life was beautiful.. almost perfect.. and then i fine day i joined the driving school!!




the most sophisticated vehicle i had driven so far was a hero cycle, so the moment i hit the road, it was like da whole world is conspiring against me & will hit me before i blink.. my reflexes have always been slow, and now was time i was cursing it the most. i am a very reasonable person but my driving teacher would really rile me with his insensitive remarks. so ya in shot the whole world truly was conspiring.

got my driving license like a piece of cake. that was when it hit me that its the easiest thing to get in India and what lay ahead freaked me even more.. any demented loony could be on the same or other side of the road waiting to attack me !!

Nothing really prepares you for hitting the road alone the first time, i had taken lots of advice from my friends and the advices were remembered and applied depending upon the years of driving experience of my buddies. As expected Murphy 's law worked not just once but twice .. i banged twice in a gap of 20 mins.. my life was rocking.. literally.

after that it was from a series of mistakes i learned how to drive safe.

i now fear only other cars, bikes, suvs, trucks and buses.. no longer scared of cycles and scooties.. ya i have come a long way..

earlier i would sit beside my friends, hear them swear like crazy and from my high pedestal reprimand them for using abusive language.i have graduated there too.. now i use the choicest of swear words that my father refuses to go on a drive with me..
so guys i totally empathize with you when you abuse.. these dumb @$7^ers so deserve it !!

i in past would hate to get my way around the world by using the fact that am a girl. now i blatantly abuse that fact. If a smile guarantees help in parking it right .. then what the heck why not?? if that helps in not getting a ticket.. sure it warrants a sweet smile.. hell i dint know the power of smile.. untill now !!

well once i master the art of driving the smiles will of course disappear.. my faithful grunge will be back .. untill then say cheeeese :)

men and their vanity !!

a dear friend of mine said he smokes to reduce weight !! i was really appalled on hearing something so vain from a man whom i thought was very logical, sensible, intelligent and above all NOT frivolous. I guess i have to welcome myself to the men of 22nd century as vain as they come.. mask it under the even more vain name "metrosexy"




i still remember when we were in school, a bro of my friend used fair and lovely and that was his life's closely guarded secret which our entire gurl gang knew thanks to his sis and we would make pathetic gags on him. but today thinking back, he must have been one of the earlier member of the brotherhood called "metrosexy"

my bro spends like almost an hour to decide what to wear for a party (its my blog and i can exaggerate a bit here .. am da gueen) , my family friend uses chapstick. well i could quote more eg.. but i guess you must have got the flow of things by now..

Ok am not crazy.. i would like my man to follow personal hygiene but getting so messed up bout one's look to such an extend is totally another ball game.

come on guys, we really don't care how hot you look, how well your brows are plucked, how you maintain your nails or the flex your bicep, tricep and whateva more ceps you have. Its whats inside you that matters. If you are compassionate, thoughtful, loving, trust worthy, not a hypocrite and understanding .. you win hands down the most desirable man title. so drop da metrosexy shit and get real ..

b a man

:P

Dexter - my tribute to Marley and Me

Am a good boi .. Now gimme da ice cream fast !!

Am da Real Cool Dude !! Wuz up Ladies, How you doing eh ;)

My two adorable Devils, broi n dexy

Oh stop torturing me with all these pics .. grrrr !!


Me Sleepy now.. so buzz off :P

Indian Female authors.. you rock gurls

I love to read, earlier i was more into international authors like Jeffery Archer, Charles Dickens, Enid Blyton, Dan Brown ( well he seriously disheartened me.. first two books awesome next two beyond awesome disasters)

But off late i have started reading indian authors, and am finding them real good. My romance with Indian author started with Chetan Bhagat, five point someone was awesome, what really made me feel more excited was he had left his email id to post comments on, I very enthusiastically and earnestly put in my thoughts in a mail, not that i wanted a reply but one acknowledgement would have been good. There came none, neways read his second book and commented, same fate when his third book was released he sends in a mail to all the fools like me to put in a word for him.. sure buddy,, as they say any publicity is good, so he did put me off him by his callousness and even worse with books to follow.



then i read indian female authors, zoya factor by anuja chauhan, almost single by Advaita Kala, finger puppet by anu jayanth, piece of cake i fogot the author.. real nice books and the humour, the choice of words, the sentiments, the thoughts, all i could relate to. But what is more nice is the interaction. All these authors are open to communication, they interact and are passionate about what they write which is so heartening.. I dun wanna sound sexist but i guess what they have in common is being a woman.. hence more sensitive, creative, empathatic and what i liked was the humour which i always thought men were better at.

Great going gurls, you rock.

but when am on Indian authors, do have to mention suketu mehta for maximum city, very well researched book, and the white tiger by aravind adiga awesome narrator .. hmm men too are gettin good at writing ;)..since we show them how to do it..

I dream of writing a book which finds more than one reader .. well someday for sure.. untill then have too many books to read..

Humanity .. an extinct trait

Today Ma and me had gone to apna bazaar, well that in itself is unusual coz i never go there, neways there was a 90 year old elegant man behind me in the queue, I offered to hold his bag and drop him home. He was so grateful and happy for doing something so trivial made me really think that we have become so selfish and self obsessed that we have somewhere stopped living and started existing.




Its like gadget, you exist, you perform as per the program your mind fixes, heart is dysfunctional, greed has enslaved all feelings,more greed, more horse power, if a part is faulty, replace it, no more fixing it right, whip it to max, find a bigger better meaner one, drop this one.

Now feelings, thoughtfulness, care, selflessness feature in a fool's dictionary. Well so be it i still am a fool, i care, i get hurt, i recover and i move on, stronger, more human and alive.. not existing but living every moment and relishing most of the moments.. morons are there to suck away some of the moments.. rest is good ...

distance makes the heart grow fonder .. dunno ...but mind go berserk.. fo sure

been almost the whole month out on tour, i was so tired and cold that sleep kinda deprived me, and my brain got hyper active. been into a lot of self analysis during this time and into reading this book called finger puppet by anu jayanth..



initially was cursing my " i can judge books by the feel of it, if not just cover" thing i have, but gradually the book got me gripped in at times to stop my hyper mind n other times, the story kinda related to me .. i all of a sudden thought i am like the villain in the book, we shared similar trait, shot temper.. the solution out there in the book was turning into vegetarian.. i am the kind where there is no other type of people other that non vegetarian n the other types are called goats.. not funny any longer but that was a silly gag we non veggies shared..

neways so i realized to live a fuller happier life turning into vegetarian was a experiment i had to indulge into. i also looked around n found my more calmer friend jigna is a vege, my volatile gas nik is non veggie.. so i knew the key element here was veg it is..

came back and the whole bunch had a laugh at my conclusion, and i all of a sudden developed urges to hav chick tandoori, kabab, tikka masala and what not.. ma made prawn curry and i fogot all bout this romance i was gonna indulge...

but today i am again thinkin bout da veggie thing and thinkin of controlling my short temperedness which is justified considering the morons that invade earth ;).. i rather control my mind.. food shdnt be dat difficult .. what say !

Relationships : a fully loaded surprise package deal !!

Relationships.. the sour - sweet torment of life.. you get jacked coz of them and yet you cannot do without them. Right from birth till death we are dragged into relationships, sometimes without our consent and rest we go there enthusiastically thinking it will lead the door to a better world.It is something that intrigued me all my life as nuances are huge and there is not user guide or protocol to follow.



Mother in particular , Family in general



The first thing I guess all learn from the relationship shared with our mother. I grew up seeing her intense love for my father, as most men behave, he too was and is pretty insensitive which has time and again hurt her, but she each time has forgiven him and loved him despite it, I really don’t know if am capable of this kind of love. My Ma is the quintessential wife and mother. Her life rotates and revolves and summer saults around baba, my brother and me. It is amazing as well as scary to see her in her elements, amazing cause there is so much love and caring she has to give to us and scary because of the expectations she has not in return of what she is giving to me, but as a token of appreciation is very high, and I am too selfish to give her that. And yet we are here inseparable inspite of our strong difference of opinion coz of the strange bond we share.

One thing that made me realize how much I love her was when I decided to go to Ahmedabad, as I wanted to experiment independence and space. The first month I spend in doing up my home, so that I would be less home sick and love it there. But as days passed by I realized the more beautiful things I bought to make this apartment a house more it felt like these things would look good in my own house, back in Bombay.After that what ever I bought I would take it back home on the weekends.

Within that month it dawned to me 2 facts:
1- I am hopelessly in love with my family
2- I am a even bigger bull shitter, I wanted independence but in real am totally dependant on my family, you know the total creeper.

So that was when I realized I was in love with my tormentors from whom I wanted freedom and could not stay 600 kms apart. Is it case of blood is thicker than water? I guess it is.

But moment I came back to Bombay it was again the eternal pursuit for happiness, my parents would never let me forget I came back home with my tail between my legs like a big time looser and I again started fantasizing and threatening a come back or shall I say in my case a go back thingy.. the battle is on .. of course its not even half hearted its just the hallow bamboo shout I throw at them when they try to suffocate me with this love or righteousness.

Dexter .. my bundle of love n craziness


Responsibility of another living being forces another relation, some choose to go full on into it and do all you can to take care of the other creature, some ensure the relationship is one of convenience, while some other blatantly abuse the relationship.

The relationship my family shares with Dexter, our four year old Labrador is off late one of my cherished relations. Until Dexy came in my life, dogs terrify me was a gross understatement, the paranoia I had for them was legendary. But as life would have it, bro wanted a dog home, and somehow Dexter was here, this little bundle in beige with huge eyes and little kiddy teeth.

The first time we saw each other, each sizing each other, I guess he liked what he saw and came to smell me, well whom am I kidding he even smells poop so that was his cursory reaction smelling me and I was terrified. Bro held on to my hand and made me touch him for the first time and rest is history.

Dexter is the first dog we had at home so my entire family had lots to learn. He pooped and peed at home initially.He ran his teeth through everything, no distinction to edible, non edible, carcinogenic, valuable, you name it .. he had visited it.Our house made him feel like alice in wonderland and he took full advantage of the fact that we were totally clueless in dealing with him.

Gradually we could make him understand his name is Dexter, what he should be eating, where to poop and pee, and loads of other instructions and in return, he taught me how to love, unconditional, total and not to hide my feelings.

He made me feel responsible for the existence of another living thing. I would wake up nights at stretch to take care of him when he is sick, religiously give him his medication which I never did for myself.

All this for just one thing, when I came back from work, his clowning around would make my world a brighter place. In him I found my childhood and my family found a reason to smile. Some how at the back of my mind I always count the days spend together as I know he won’t be there forever and that saddens me a lot but then life is all about moments and I bring myself back to the present one and see Dexter come to me with a ball to play with, so here I go..

Friendship .. Jai n Veeru isthytle



Friendship, a relation of choice, where we hop in uncertain but with time we realize the value of it and then learn to preserve it or do away with it. Sometimes it’s a spur of a moment decision to befriend someone, which lasts a lifetime and sometimes its situation that drags two people together, leaving them no other alternative but to develop a friendship to survive.

When I think of a cherished friendship, I think of Ketan, my buddy from school, we were together 3 grades and shared a very special bond, we would fight with each other so much that as punishment we would be made to sit together so that we develop tolerance for each other. I would divide the bench by drawing a line and ensure he gets adequately punished for crossing the line, sometimes it would be punishment without a reason. But gradually tolerance is what we developed towards each other. We actually gradually became friends.

As we were growing up, our friendship got names it dint deserve so I stopped talking to him, and he got sick so wouldn’t come to school. Last I remember him coming to school, very week. Looked like a shadow of his old self, asking me for notes. I gave it to him but dint talk much and he said sorry and went away. I still remember the day I got the news that Ketan was no more, he died of cancer. The reason he missed school was he was severely sick, but he never let me know that. He knew it would be difficult for me.

I still remember him at times and in all my relation of friendships I somewhere search for Ketan. But life is so full of surprises, my brother and his brother are best friends even though they dint go to the same school, nor had the same set of friends. I guess this is Ketan’s way of still being there as a friend in my life.

Boss .. yes the creature you deal with every morning !!



Mentor, a guide, a philosopher, a parent without the strings, many of us have shared a unique relation with our tormentor at work, our boss. How we love to hate them and feel we could handle situations much better than they did. We love to keep sick nick names for them and code names for all the things they do.

The best relation of a boss and subordinate I shared was with Mr Chatterjee. The whole office was scared of him, well not coz of his looks, he is very handsome but for the respect he commanded. He would push me to think out of the box and encourage me to try new things. He would always take me to a new world and leave me free to explore on my own and would be there to guide me when I needed it, never asking anything in return.He taught me that its ok if you go wrong in something new you were trying but at least now you know what not to do and why.

Mentors have insatiable hunger to learn more all their lives and want to share the good knowledge they have learned all their lives and for that they keep updating. I am so proud of him that at the age of 56 he has gone to USA to study something new. This thirst for knowledge, the urge to do better and the charisma to make others also follow, to lead by example is what made him so larger than life.

The relation I shared with him is strong till date, the connection is for ever, he always knows when I need him to be there and he ensures he is there without my asking. Yes he is my mentor my guide my philosopher and a parent without string…


Superman a myth..still i hold on to my dream :)



And now here I am waiting for the relationship of a lifetime. Waiting to get swept off my feet, which is really difficult considering my weight, as a result I have taken up dieting with a new zeal, loving, caring, and giving unconditional and total. But I am yet to figure out the protocol, or find a user manual as I don’t want to be taken for granted nor do I want to be hurt. When I sit here on my comp, dreaming my girly fantasies, the total submission to another human being freaks me, excites me leaving a funny sensation in the bit of my stomach.

Yes relationships indeed are a fully loaded surprise package deal, gives us a reason to wake up each morning, to smile, to feel pain, to overcome pain and live again, to make mistakes, to know its ok to be wrong and yet someone will love you inspite of your bad hair day, to be angry and yet give someone the power to melt you with a smile or a touch, to expect and bring in surprise into another life, to mean the world and make someone your world, to hurt and enjoy that demonic feeling for a bit and then to give in more love once the lesson that need to be learned is done. Yes relationships are amazing as they really teach you to live life and accept it with all its ups and downs, flips and flops, surprises and blow ups…

Merry Christmas